So it’s been three weeks since I posted.  I don’t get paid for this.  If I did, I promise it would have only been two weeks since my last post.

Anyway, this is about the kids right?  I kind of forgot about them.  I mean, sometimes I just block them out of my mind.  Impossible you say. Well, have you ever slept somewhere with the light on, TV blaring and people talking?  If so, you can block out kids.  Also, alcohol helps.

Ok, I’m kidding – sort of.

 So, what have they been up to in the past three weeks since I’ve posted?  Well, it’s actually been pretty normal.  There have been numerous fights, 38 spilled drinks, 16 complete meltdowns, at least eight fairly serious injuries, 99 “she/he started its,” 64 “for no-reason” screams, four biting episodes (which is actually below normal), 13 nude sightings (only one coming from Oliver) and 618 “nos” from Mom and Dad.

Other than that, everything’s been great.

To be fair, it’s not like we asked all three of them to be within six years of each other and live together under the same roof.  I know for a fact I participated in all of the above and practically majored instarting fights with my sister during my childhood education called “growing up.” 

However, it still wears on you as a parent.  And I’m pretty sure it will never be easy.  A conversation I had the other day with someone who has teenagers pretty much confirmed that.  When they’re pre-teens we’ll be stressed about answering sex questions – if we haven’t already.  When they are teens we’ll be worried about if they’re having sex, and when they’re 25 we’ll be wondering if they’ll every move out of the house.  Actually I’m documenting it now, that if any of my children live under my roof full-time and they are old enough to buy their own beer, they must pay Jamie and me at least $500 per month, do ourlaundry, and share some of said beer.

For now though, we’ll just keep plugging along as parents.  It’s never easy, mostly fun, but sometimes so damn frustrating that I wish I had money to pay for boarding school.  But then there’s the whole “grass is greener on the other side” thing and I guess I’d miss them when they were away attending school in Europe heading to bars at the age of 15 and sending me pictures on their i-phone 17.

Like I said, not much has gone on around here since the last post.  Although, Mitch did turn seven yesterday and I turned 31 on the 17^th, so 40% of us literally aged since then.  And no matter what happens, I’m glad the five of us are growing old together as a family.  I just hope we can cut down on the spilled drinks at dinner.

A week without kids

When the van pulled away with the three little hellions, er, children, en route to Virginia Beach for a week the emotions present were strange.  For one, none of the kids seemed to mind. Even little Ollie went with the flow and was high-fiving cousins Illiana and Jose in his car seat and waving to Mom and Dad like he would be back for dinner.  He even wanted to take a stab at driving.

Ollie and Aunt Sally right before
 the beach trip.

For me it was only a matter of how much Jamie would cry, not if, once her babies went to Aunt Sally and Uncle Jose's house for a full week.  But she seemed to go as Ollie went, and the tear ducts stayed dry.  We didn't exactly knock anything off our bucket lists while they were gone, but we were able to do what most adults our age do -- you know, normal stuff.  We saw a movie, outside of the living room, went to dinner with other adults, who did not throw any food on the floor by the way, and laughed a little -- a lot -- at co-worker James' West End Comedy improv show.

When the child-less week was over last Saturday we were ready for the house to be filled with stomps, screams and scraps between the older two.  Why, you ask? Maybe because we're crazy or maybe because we miss the crazy.  It's cliche, but as nice as it was to be alone (and we thank you Sally and Jose) we wouldn't have it any other way than the five of us under one roof -- even if that means we witness the kids at times acting stranger than a talking teddy bear with a 35-year-old best bud.

Anyone with children knows they like routines, and the Norris clan has not been on one for a few weeks after visits from some Kansas cousins after the beach trip.  Strangely though, they haven't acted as crazy as they usually do. I mean there was the occasional naked kid running through the house, Ollie walking around trying to put everyone's shoes on for them and not taking kindly to anyone who refused his offer and a certain almost seven-year-old who kept singing Cher Lloyd's, "Want U Back" over and over again.  But like I said, nothing too crazy!

A visit from Jordan, Jacob and Luke. Oh, and Aunt Brenda too!